The proper presentation of the casket flag and presenting
additional National flags is an issue that often causes a substantial amount of
discussion and argument during the planning process of a police funeral.
The presentation of an additional National flag to someone chosen
by the family is a well-established practice and should be recognized as a
legitimate part of the honors ceremony if the surviving family requests it. As
all funeral coordinators know, what the surviving family wants is paramount. If
the surviving family wants a specific person or persons to receive an
additional National flag, then they will.
There is only one casket flag, the National flag. This is the flag
that is folded and presented to the surviving family, usually the surviving
spouse. Any additional National flags presented shall be pre-folded. They must be presented and received with dignity and
respect. There is no requirement that they be presented by the agency executive,
chief or sheriff. They may be presented by someone else if the presentation
would be more meaningful to the recipient. If the surviving spouse agrees that
the presentation of an additional flag by the deceased officer’s patrol partner
to the deceased officer’s young son, whom the partner knows well, would have a
special meaning, then it should be done.
There have been times when members of a funeral planning team
adamantly argued that no one except a family member should receive an
additional National flag. There is no restriction as to who can receive an
additional flag. It is done at the surviving family’s request. There is no
limit as to how many flags can be presented. However, the requests must be
reasonable.
At one funeral planning meeting the deceased officer’s parents had
made a request that an additional flag be presented to their son’s fiancee. A
planning team member argued the fact that the officer had not officially asked
the woman to marry him, even though his parents had talked to him about it and
it was common knowledge that he was going to officially ask her soon, she
should not receive a flag.
At another funeral, the family wanted three flags given to
relatives that were members of law enforcement agencies, one the same agency as
the deceased, the other two in other local agencies. On another occasion, a
wife asked that each of her two sons get a pre-folded flag. All of these people
deserved to get a pre-folded flag because it is what the surviving family asked
for. There should be no judgmental discussion about the worthiness of an
individual or their official relationship to the deceased. If the family asks
for additional flags, just do it.
Can a request be denied? Although I have never experienced a
situation where I would deny someone an additional flag, I am sure there could
be a situation where it might be inappropriate and therefore withheld. The
presentation of a National flag to someone is more than fulfilling a surviving family’s
request. It is a profound symbolic gesture. It is an honor. It needs to be
presented and received with dignity and respect. It represents the patriotism and
dedication and self sacrifice of the deceased officer and of every officer
attending the funeral. In my opinion, if I had verified reasonable cause to
believe that the intended recipient would not receive the flag in the manner
that it was intended, with dignity and respect, then I would deny the request
for it to be presented.
At many line-of-duty funeral honors ceremonies, other flags are
presented to the family. These are usually a state flag and possibly a military
flag or organizational flag. These flags should be presented by the appropriate
entity representative after the casket flag and any other pre-folded National
flags have been presented. They should be appropriately pre-folded.
The surviving family and all National flag recipients should
either receive an appropriate display box for the flag or be informed of how and
where to acquire one. These flags are presented as a memorial to the deceased
and hopefully will be displayed. Agency funeral coordinators should ensure the
family is able to acquire the display or shadow boxes and try to ensure they
are appropriately displayed.
If a surviving family is uncertain what they will do with the
casket flag after it is presented and do not intend to immediately display it,
the agency executive may request the flag so that it can be appropriately
displayed at the agency until the family is ready for its return.
John Cooley
PoliceFunerals.Com
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